The Book Whore-ders Delights

What would you say is the most embarrassing thing you have done or had done to you ?
Chrissy: I'm pretty sure that my sole purpose in this world is to embarrass myself. I have no filter and verbal diarrhea tends to spew from my mouth daily. But as of lately my autocorrect on my phone has been fucking my world up. Wendy and I were discussing books one time and I meant to tell her that I was in need of some ugly tears but autocorrect just randomly decided to change tears to twats (yeah that word is programmed into my phone) so my sentence ended up being "I'm in need of some ugly twats." Of course I posted that shit all over my Facebook wall because its fucking hilarious.

Wendy:Oh, God!! This could be bad. I don't get easily embarrassed but when I do it's usually something I've done to myself. I think the most memorable one would be when I was reading Seduction and Snacks by Tara Sivec. I was in public and died laughing at a moment when I had to pee really bad. Yea, I totally wet myself and even let out a stinky. haahaa! So mortifying! Thank you, Tara for the humor by the way. I fucking love those books. Damn, that's kinda funny now that I think about it.

Craziest Fan moment ?
Chrissy: Hmmm I don't know if I have an exact crazy moment but I do get stupidly excited when an author likes or comments on one of my Facebook posts. Julie Prestsater once told me she stalks my Facebook page for laughs so that made me feel really fan girly. And just last week Colleen Hoover commented on a video that I posted of my kids after they stole my husbands phone and decided to make their own video. I mostly posted it because it was hilarious and I wanted my family to see it but I never expected one of my favorite authors to watch it.

Wendy:I got to interview Michelle Valentine for a guest review spot on The Book Avenue Review. All of my questions got answered and then I got a pm from Michelle later on and a personalized signed copy of a book from her.

Favorite book and or author ?
Chrissy: Can I call bullshit on this question? There really are so many to name. I don't have just one of either. Anything by Colleen Hoover, Jamie McGuire, Michelle Valentine, Kelli Maine, Tara Sivec, this list could go on forever.

Wendy: Oh, this is not a fair question at all. Shit! I love so many authors and books! I will say that I've got really great relationships with several authors and I definitely consider them to be my favorite.

Pick one !
Import or Muscle car
Chrissy: Definitely muscle. There's just something about the purr of the motor of a muscle car that makes me vagina do a little happy dance, but if some random billionaire wants to buy me an import I wouldn't turn it down.

Wendy : Muscle, I guess. The vibrations are always good

One Direction or Justin Bieber
Chrissy: Are you fucking kidding me? Neither! I'm sure ill be forced to listen to either of them when I'm sitting in hell and when that happens I'd choose the Biebs over one direction because my 6yo daughter forces me to listen and make my ears bleed and those damn words to that Love Me song are already stuck in my head so I could sing along to that.

Wendy What the fuck?!? okay, Justin. He's growing into his own. Plus, I don't even really know One Direction. My 6 yr old says I have to pick JB

White, Dark or Milk Chocolate

Chrissy: I'm weird and I don't like chocolate but I would probably pick milk chocolate over the others because of I like the creamy gooiness in my mouth. Wait! We're still talking about chocolate right?

Wendy : Dark, melt in your mouth yumminess! Although, I'll be honest, I'm not much for chocolate. I'd rather have something salty.

Sam or Dean

Chrissy: Who the fuck are Sam and Dean? Am I missing out on man candy that I don't know about? Do I need to rename my shower head Sam or Dean?

Wendy :What, who the fuck are they?

Commando , Boxers or Briefs

Chrissy: Commando or boxers. Or Boxer Briefs. Briefs just make me want to laugh though.

Wendy:Commando for sure. Or breifs. I love how they're form fitting so you can get an impression of the package if the pants are tight enough. Lol

Damon or Stephan

Chrissy: Damon. Oh fuck me! Definitely Damon!

Wendy:Damon! Dear God, yes please Ian.

Wine or Mixed drink
Chrissy: Both. I have a healthy love for both.

Wendy:Arbor Mist-wine I love that stuff even if it makes me sort of lushy. haha

Coke or Pepsi

Chrissy: I prefer Diet Pepsi over Diet Coke OR Coke Zero over Pepsi Max.

Wendy: Neither. Not a soda drinker. However, I used to drink a ton of Pepsi, so if you need an answer that would be it.

Biker boy or Rocker dude

Chrissy: TRICK QUESTION!! Can't I just have both? Really all I need is either covered in tattoos and piercings


Wendy: Both! Rocker with a bike.

Do you believe in vampires?
Chrissy: No but if Damon Salvatore was real I would let him put his mouth on more than just my neck. *fans vagina while thinking of those thoughts*

Wendy : Eh, no. But, if one came out of nowhere, I'd let him give me a reason to believe. *smirking*

If you could have a super power what power would you pick?
Chrissy: Mind control

Wendy: Telekinesis powers would be awesome

What would you do with your super power if you had it?
Chrissy:I would definitely have people doing embarrassingly hilarious things just so I can laugh.

Wendy: Keep my house clean while still being able to sit around and read. Ha!

Would you abuse your super power? How?
Chrissy: ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY! I would probably have people walking into walls on purpose.

Wendy: Uh, I'm not sure. I'd like to say no, but I probably would. Course then I'd weigh like 500lbs so NO! My answer is no, I would not abuse my power.

What is your favorite alcoholic beverage?
Chrissy: Hmmm either a Pineapple Upside down cake ( cake vodka, pineapple juice and a splash of grenadine) or a Monster java mixed with Whipped vodka.

Wendy: I don't drink except on holidays now. I know, I'm boring. I used to be best friends with Jose and the Captian though. In fact, I've got a couple of scars and some memories of nights with those boys.

Do you ever leave home without panties on ?
Chrissy:I have but it's usually when I've gone on a week long reading spree and don't do laundry so i have no clean panties.

Wendy: Sure. I used to never because I wouldn't know where I'd be the next day, but then I figured that if guys can go commando, why not me, ya know?

Have you ever had sex while at work (any job)? If so, where?
Chrissy: I work from home so yes!

Wendy: Honestly, no. I haven't worked many places that I would have been able to get my nookie on, unless I wanted to join the other team. Plus, I've always been in relationships and I'm definitely not trying to get the hanky on with a co-worker. Unless you want to consider oral. YIKES!

What is the strangest place you ever had sex?

Chrissy: Ermmm I really hope my family doesn't read these answers. With my husband while he was driving down the road and we were passing at least 3 cops that had different cars pulled over. I don't know if they had a DUI checkpoint or something going on but we were never pulled over. Thank Fuck for that!

Wendy: hmm....I'm not real sure about strange but more inappropriate. Lol In broad daylight at an outdoor hotel swimming pool. OOPS! I guess when you're in the mood, huh?

What turns you on more, reading a sexual story, watching a porn or listening to sex?
Chrissy: I would have to say reading because its usually more in depth. Porn has no storyline and listening is just noises.

Wendy: All of the above. Depends on my mood

What profession do you find the most arousing sexually?
Chrissy: Any that involves muscle usage. A strong muscled man makes my vajayjay quiver.

Wendy: Wow! well, if the guy has a job that's good. I think something in the military is hot but I also like a cocky guy so I think if he's self assured in any position he holds then it's arousing.

Does size matter ?
Chrissy: Yes and No. Size really isn't that big of an issue for me as long as its used right. I've never come across a mini peen but I feel like I would definitely need a sign that reads "your dick must be at least this long to ride this ride." It needs to be able to reach NEAR my G spot.

Wendy: Yea! It takes a long time to get to England from the US in a row boat.

Sex Toys: got any?
Chrissy: Yup, Toys make sex more fun

Wendy: Occasionally. ;-)

Do you or have you ever had a “cop” fantasy?
Chrissy: I can't say that I ever have but now that I'm thinking about it I wouldn't mind having my arms handcuffed behind my back and bent over the hood of a cruiser. So thank you now I have a new fantasy that needs to be full-filled.

Wendy I dated a cop right out of highschool. Needless to say, my fantasies all dried up with him after we split.

Do you or have you ever had a “Delivery Guy” or “Service Man” fantasy?
Chrissy: I've never had a delivery guy or service man come to my house that wasn't twice my age and fat and balding, so no

Wendy: You know what, this is really funny! Most Delivery and Service guys are gross, but I'll tell you, at my last job we had a sexy as fuck Service Man. He would come every 2 weeks to make sure the kitchen equipment was working correctly. I've never fantasized about him before, but I might be now.

If you were on a bus and got a glimpse up a pantiless girl’s skirt would you keep looking?
Chrissy: No but I would probably loudly inform her that her Ham Wallet is showing so other people could stare

Wendy: haha! WHAT!?!?! I'm not a fan of other ham wallets, so no

Funniest sexual experience you've ever had
Chrissy: LOL! When my husband and I first started dating we were at a party and we both had been drinking so when we were dropped off at his apartment we attempted to have sex but we were both so drunk we couldn't figure out each others clothes and what needed to go where that we eventually just gave up because we were laughing hysterically half clothed and we ended up falling a sleep like that.

Wendy: Fuck! Okay, I dated this guy in a band. We were out at a bar they were playing at and he wanted to get nookie before their set. We went behind the curtain they set up, which also happened to be right behind the drum kit. We really had no idea, but everytime he would "thrust", his head was hitting the big drum thing that sits on the floor. Yea, the entire bar was curious but no one wanted to "explore" to find out what it was. Damn that shit was hilarious when we came out. My friend was sitting down with her drink laughing at us like she knew. She totally did too. haha!

Most embarrassing sexual Experience ?
Chrissy: The morning after previous mentioned experience reliving the happening of the night before with a hangover from hell.

Wendy: Getting caught by my mom and dad giving head. Holy shit! That was bad.
Next question please

What is the strangest sexual experience you’ve had?
Chrissy: Please refer to funniest sexual experience questions.

Wendy: When my husband and I first started dating, I made a bet with my roomate that I wouldn't sleep with him for at least 2 months. The first time we hooked up, yes it was before the 2 months were up, we had to be really really quite so we did it in my closet with all the blankets piled up around the door and the lights and tv and radio on. It was so weird because it was our first time and he was okay with me telling him how we had to do it.

What would you do if you could be a guy for a day?
Chrissy: Play with my dick and balls and Pee standing up without it dribbling down my leg. I might ask Wendy if she would want to play swords too.

Wendy: Oh I would so sit around and play with my dick and balls all day. I'd also have to get one of those pocket pussies. I've asked my husband to explain to me what it feels like for him to be balls deep in snatch and he always says he can't, so I would need to know. Oh, and how cool would it be to pee standing up!? Yeah, that would be cool. I'd drink a lot so I could piss a lot.

How would you describe yourself so that someone could pick you out?
Chrissy: Crazy. I'm definitely crazy. I love practical jokes and do them often to my husband. Oh and I'm also the girl with two different colored eyes

Wendy: I am a freakishly controlling, smartass, that tends to have some really "flighty" moments. By flighty I mean I get confused easily and sometimes I have, and I hate putting it this way but what better way to describe it, blonde days. Lol!

What's the last thought in your head that involved someone you like?
Chrissy: Well about 5 minutes ago I really wanted to nut punch my husband whom i like/love because he was bitching about not finding any clean clothes. Yes I'm pantie-less today.

Wendy: I was thinking that my husband needs to hurry his ass home so that I don't end up having to cook dinner tonight. I hate cooking!

What is a question you want me to ask you?
Chrissy: What my favorite words are. I have soooo many I want to share with you!

Wendy: Eh, whatever you want. I'm pretty much an open book

What is a question you refuse to answer?
Chrissy:What my favorite book is. I don't have just one I have several. There's no way I could choose one of the other.

Wendy: Yeah, I can't answer anything that involves me having to tell you what my favorite book, movie or song is. It's just too tough.

Any tat's or piercings ? If so where ..
Chrissy:Yes I currently have 3. I got a tribal tramp stamp when I was 18 but covered it up about 3 years ago with a giant tribal butterfly that takes up the entire lower half of my back. I have the word Beautiful on my right wrist and the word Disaster on my left wrist (I had both before beautiful disaster were released.) those tattoos remind me of who I am and what I've been through. Disaster representing all my insecurities. My constant anxiety. My need to turn of the emotions and just live without feeling pain. Beautiful represents my laughter, my husband and 3 kids, my need to want to take people's pain and sorrow away. I also have 8 more tattoos that I have planned.

Wendy: Yup! 4 tats. Both feet and ankles and the back of my neck., just my ears are pierced but I'm hoping to get my nose re-pierced. Had to take that shit out when I was pregnant. The smell of things was nauseating.

If you had to lose one of your senses which one would you pick? Why?
Chrissy: Definitely my hearing. I would never have to listen to other people's bullshit again!

Wendy: Taste. I can't stand the thought of not being able to "see" my kids grow, "hear" their laughter, "feel" their hands in mine and "smell" their perfect scents. I know, getting emotional with this one.

Pet peeve?
Chrissy: People that don't know how to take a joke because they think they're better. I hate those types of people. We all started in our mothers wombs nobody is better than anyone else.

Wendy: I have so many! One of my biggest ones when people chew with their mouths open. GAHHHH... So fucking rude and disgusting!

So tell us something nobody knows about you ?

Chrissy: Too late! I don't keep secrets. Not even about myself. My husband and a few very close friends know everything about me

Wendy: hmmm...I can't think of anything that no one knows. I'm pretty open about things.

What characteristics make up your ideal book boyfriend?
Chrissy: I would definitely say I love the alpha male characters that say pussy and cock a lot. I love the bad boy with a guarded heart that feels confident and control of a fuck. Dominance in any BBF makes my vagina happy too. So I think all of those combined would make my ideal BBF

Wendy: Give me alpha male all day long. Tattoo's, peircings, controlling, a little mysterious. A mix between a Travis Maddox, Rule Archer, James Cavendish, Dorian Soktos and Braden Carmichael. Lol I know, it's hard to come up with that perfect BBF, but if I could pick, he'd have certain qualities from each of these guys and maybe even some others

What does it take to get you to pick up a book? ie, cover, synops, etc?
Chrissy: I have to say that i'm definitely guilty of judging a book by its cover and that's how I choose most books.

Wendy: I'm bad about this, but I always judge a book first by it's cover. Most times I wont even pick one up to read the synops unless the cover looks good. Let me explain this though, when I see a cover, it's my very first impression of the book. If the cover has some seriously smokin couple on it, hell yea! I'm definitely gonna pick it up and read the back. If there's a couple that doesn't seem very attractive on the cover, I MIGHT pick it up, but the title better be damn good and the synops better be even better. Also, I will more than likely pick up a book to read the synops if the title catches my attention and/or the cover is just unique. I'll explain why unattractive covers more than likely cause me to skim over them; say there's a guy on the cover and he's not what I consider to be good looking, if I decide to read the book anyway, I'm constantly having this not so attractive guy in my head as the leading character and that shit pisses me off. I need HOTNESS!!! I know, I know....Never base a book by it's cover. But really, it's hard not to.

Thanks again for being here, we had a blast and hope to have you back again soon .
Did you have anything else you’d like to say before we go ?
Chrissy:Yes, Twat Weasel, Cunt Muffin, Douche canoe, FuckTruck..... I didn't get to use those words in this interview at all so I wanted to say them now.

 

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