Tuesday, January 24, 2017

First Official #NerdandTurd Interview

It's finally release day for Before the Lie by KD Robichaux!

As a special Release Day event for readers, we asked everyone, 
"If you could ask Kayla and Matthew anything, what would it be?" 

Here are our answers!

It was love at first sight.
Not just for me, but for Corbin as well.
Our eyes locked across the room, and that was all she wrote.
But we didn’t rush things.
We wanted to do it right.
After all, we would spend the rest of our lives together.
The love of my life.
My soul mate.
He was the intense and fiercely protective soldier,
and I was his doting and faithful lover.
I found my happily ever after.
This was our story…
Before the Lie

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If you two were stuck on a deserted island and could each only bring one item, what would it be?

Nerd: A razor that never dulls.

Turd: Volleyball... and I'd name it Wilson.

Have you ever thought about become a photographer?

Nerd: Nope. I’ll let the pros handle that one!

Turd: Nah, not my thing. 

What are your number one fears? Something you know you will have a hard time overcoming.

Nerd: I’m not afraid of heights, but I’d never jump out of an airplane or go bungee jumping! Also, I’m deathly afraid of the ocean. I don’t think I’ll ever get over that one.

Turd: Failure, and I know it will be tough to get where I want to be in life, but I'll never stop trying. 

One thing you would love to accomplish that you have not accomplished yet?

Nerd: I’d like to be a bestseller one day. That would be awesome! 

Turd: Business owner. 

Oldest piece of clothing you own? And why keep it?

Nerd: It’s not clothing, but I still sleep with the baby blanket I came home from the hospital in. I will be buried with it. I keep it because it’s literally my security blanket and I can’t sleep without it.

Turd: Some of my gym shirts... and because I'm cheap Haha

Since coming into the book world, for both of you, what would be the best and worst thing that has happened?

Nerd: Best: all the friends I’ve made. Worst: seeing pitchfork mentality.

Turd: Made great friends and been able to help so many people. Worst: Seeing how nasty some people are behind closed doors.
Last time you were in trouble, what did you do?

Nerd: Ummmm… I got stuck under my barbell during my chest press. My man-bestie Logan had to help me before I suffocated LOL

Turd: Called my Watch Commander—keep in mind we're cops—and said, “I'm in jail. Can you pick me up?”

Where do each of you see yourselves in 5 years?

Nerd: New York Times Bestselling Author list! A girl can dream, right?

Turd: Hopefully owning my own Nutrition Shop and Gym.

Creepiest/ nastiest/ weirdest message you've ever gotten?

Nerd: A pic of Matthew pooping while picking his nose LOL

Turd: A hairy asshole with a butt plug in it. -_-

Nerd: Ewwww! That’s worse than the unsolicited vag-pics you said you got. *shivers  
PSA, peeps: He doesn’t like those.

If there was anything you could do to have a redo what would be? And how do think it would change who you are or what you would be doing now?

Nerd: That time I found out I was allergic to avocados… definitely wouldn’t have eaten my weight in guacamole! I wouldn’t have spent 2 days puking my brains out.

Turd: I'd never change the past. I embrace all of it, the good and the bad. I'm happy with how I turned out so far. Even if it was hard at times.

Now that you named the tooth, have you ever thought of naming his eyebrow or at least putting a "caution: has been known to make women weak at the knees" sign on it?? Especially when he says darlin’ along with it. I can imagine there are plenty of people out there that could benefit from that sign.

Nerd: LOL! No, just the tooth. Nigel is my weakness! Although Turd has got some serious #jawporn going on in my cover for Before the Lie! 

In case y'all missed it, this is Nigel ;-) 

Turd: Lol

If you could go on vacation anywhere in the world, where would you go and who would you take? Only one person. Also, if you could give it all up and move anywhere in the world, where would you go? And who would go with you?

Nerd: My favorite place in the world to go on vacation is New Orleans, and Turd and I are going on a road trip there next month for the Bella Nola Author Event. My favorite city with my best friend? Yes, please! I’m happy with where I live in Texas though!

Turd: A month long huntin’ trip in Tennessee with my dad... no electronics, no people, just us.

If you could go back to your teenage self and give yourself one piece of advice what would you say?

Nerd: Your mom is right. Fuck all these people picking on you and sending you home crying. They will NOT matter in a few years.

Turd: Not a thing. Everything I ever did has made me who I am today, including the bad things.

What inspired you to start writing?

Nerd: I’ve wanted to write love stories since I was 12 and snuck off with my mom’s Sandra Brown books!

Turd: The community as a whole.

Would you ever do a photoshoot together?

Nerd: Yes! We did a couple pics together in Nashville as a warm-up. We have a photoshoot planned for March 17th with the amazing Golden Czermak!

Turd: We have and will do more in March :D 

Where do I find a Matthew calendar, and a Kayla book?

Nerd: Here’s my Amazon page with all my books: 

Turd: Here’s the link to my calendar: 

You are both beautiful. When you get to escape from reality, where is your favorite place to reset?

Nerd: Thank you so much! <3 I basically live in my bathtub. It’s my happy place. Also, tanning beds. It’s like a little 15-minute bubble of white noise. Love it.

Turd: The woods... deep... away from all civilization. 

If you could do anything in the world (Other than what you are doing now) what would it be?

Nerd: Hmmmm… be a professional cosplayer! (See why he calls me Nerd? Lol)

Turd: Be a country music singer.

How many times a day do you shit?

Nerd: Depends on if I took my Adderall that day ;-)

Turd: 5 to 6

Nerd: Dear God, man! 

What are you attracted to in a mate?

Nerd: Dark eyes and tattoos

Turd: Assertiveness, and most importantly... a woman who doesn't need me but wants me. 

How did you meet and start working together?

Nerd: *deep breath… I had tagged my friend in a dachshund (wiener dog) meme, and she tagged Matthew in it. He commented back, saying “I’ve seriously sat here and watched your profile video like 10 times. Love your little girl in the background singing her heart out!” or something like that. My profile video was of me and my daughter singing “Belle” from Beauty and the Beast LOL! I thought it was pretty cool that a “male model” would notice something like that, since in my experience most of them were all douche canoes who just posted gym selfies all the time. So I friend requested him, and after he accepted, I was blown away by how much we had in common. I sent him a message letting him know I wasn’t a creepy stalker chick, and told him how my dad is retired Navy, and I had also worked at GNC for 6 years (seeing he is in the Navy, and had posted a funny video of him working at GNC and playing with a Shake Weight.) He took the time to respond, and after chatting back and forth, we realized we were pretty much meant to BFFs, especially when we realized we both lived in the same small town in NC at one point when we were little. Fated friends! As for the working together part, he saw my modeling portfolio done by Mike Fox Photography, and basically demanded that I do a couples shoot with him with FuriousFotog. We were going to do it on the Book Splash cruise, but I had to have major surgery last month, so in order to give me time to heal and get back in shape, we moved it to March! We’re also co-writing a book, so watch out for that! 

Turd: She explained it best.

How close are you guys coming to Arizona for signings?

Nerd: Vegas is the closest we have this year! Authors, Books, and Poker Chips!

Turd: Vegas with her :D 

Because you know Matthew personally, did some of his character traits come through when you wrote Corbin in Before the Lie?

Nerd: Oh, for sure! Corbin is 100% physically Matthew, right down to the tattoos and bald head. His personality is too. Matthew helped me a lot with Corbin’s POV. I would send him an excerpt, and ask, “How would you react to this?” And his responses always had an affect on how I had Corbin react.

Any plans to come to Tampa?

Nerd: Not Tampa specifically, but for Florida, we’ll be leaving out of Ft. Lauderdale for Book Splash, and fingers crossed I get into Wicked Book Weekend! If I do, I’ll definitely be sweet talking Turd into coming with me!

Turd: I'll be at Readers and Writers in Tampa August 19th 2017.

Would you maybe consider doing a book with Ashley Wheels? Of course with Turd on the cover?

Nerd: Heck yeah! I love me some Ashley. She is my fellow survivor of Matthew’s gas LOL!

Turd: Ashley's my girl!

Will you be able to attend any UK or Irish signings in the future?

Nerd: OMG I’d love to! *side-eyes Jo Webb

Turd: Patten Wylder will be sponsoring me to attend "When in Wales" June 2018 and "Titanic Signing in Ireland" March 2018

How do you guys find time to co-write? And does it mainly include Nerd asking the Turd questions? Or is he able to contribute and thicken the plot?

Nerd: We are still in the plotting process of our book, but he is definitely contributing! We’re thinking he will write the male POV and I’ll write the female!

Turd: I will actually be writing pieces myself :)

Does he "actually" read what you've written and then add in his 2 cents?

Nerd: He likes to pretend he doesn’t know how to read, but he gives in to his bestie. He read Before the Lie in chunks as I wrote it.

Turd: I have indeed read everything Nerd sends me.

What made you guys decide to combine your heads and write a book?

Nerd: It was a squirrel moment. We have a lot of those. He said he thought it’d be cool to co-write a book someday, and then I told him about a story I wanted to write, but didn’t think I had the brainpower to do it by myself. He LOVED the premise, so we decided it would be our first book together. One of several, hopefully! 

Turd: Well, I've wanted to get into it for a while. I've been more set in doing some sort of comedy novel. However, this may give me a base for what's to come. Plus, Kayla is my nerd, so we can come up with some pretty crazy shit together.

Matthew, do you "enjoy" reading about yourself with the female character?

Nerd: *giggles  I wanna hear this answer.

Turd: No, I don't enjoy it in the way I believe you're getting at. I do think it's cool that some of the authors actually base their characters off me by asking what I would say. 

Would you both come to Australia for a book event?

Nerd: I’m super ADD and long flights are seriously torture for me, especially since I can’t sleep on planes. I would have to work myself up to it.

Turd: I will be at Riveting Reads Australia event in "Brisbane, Australia" with Author Patten Wylder October 2017. 

I know you met in real life for the first time at NNAE, but how did you become so close before that?

Nerd: Lots of squirrel moments. We have a stupid amount in common, and love all the same things. Any time I’d see a meme or something that reminded me of him or made me die laughing, I’d send it, and he did the same. And we’ve never stopped. I grew up with three big brothers. I’ve always had close male friends, and very few girlfriends until I got into the book world, where I finally found my tribe. Matthew always has my back, always in my corner no matter what. Even when I’m having paranoid, crazy girl moments, he chills me out and makes me laugh. 

Turd: She's a stalker. #thatisall

Nerd: In your dreams, Turd.

Are you planning any other stories after BTL?

Nerd: Yes! Its sequel, Truth Revealed, is planned for March. Plus, our co-written book should be out before September! 

Turd: Be on the lookout for my next New York Times Bestseller "Redneck Lovin’." 

How long have you two been working as a team? And what do you like to do to help others?

Nerd: Feels like forever, but it’s only been 7 months! Sometimes, you just click with someone, and you’reas close, if not closer, as to the people you’ve known for decades. All my time not with my kids is spent in the book world. I love helping other authors. I’m also a full-time editor, so I help authors get their babies as close to perfect as humanly possible. 

Turd: What she said for the first part. I've actually been blessed with an amazing fanbase and made some incredible friends here in the book world, allowing me to do some pretty awesome things for families in need of help, and also other charity foundations, such as "Honor The Sacrifice".

Kayla, What advice would you give to anyone wanting to co-author a book? Matt, How has this experience been for you? Have you enjoyed being part of the writing process so far?

Nerd: Make sure you do it with someone who you admire their work. Usually, same genre would be a good idea.

Turd: Well from what I've done so far, I have to say it's fun. Especially going back and forth with Kayla about what I'd say, as opposed to what she thinks is better. Apparently "Buttering your biscuit" isn't okay for an opening line to a woman. Who'd have known?! 

Where did Nigel come from? And why is he your favorite?

Nerd: Since day one, I’ve always told him that his sharp tooth makes my soul happy. He has the BEST smile, and that one tooth always stood out to me. Maybe it’s my obsession with vampire romance LOL! I’ve threatened for a long time that I was going to name it, and he said “Do it!” so when I thought about it, and asked myself “If that tooth had a personality, what would it be?” I decided it was a sophisticated yet naughty British gent, and the first name that popped into my head was Nigel haha!

Turd: She's weird.

Nerd: It’s why you love me :P

Where is your next signing, and how is it to work with each other? What’s the name/names of the books and where to buy them?

Nerd: My next signing is Book Splash, which Matthew is also attending! Then we will be at Bella Nola Author Event together the following weekend! I love working with Matthew. I have never seen another model support their authors the way he does. He does everything within his power to promote the books he’s on the covers of. Plus, he’s pretty freaking hilarious, so I plan on keeping him around for a long time! You can find all of my books here: 

Turd: Book Splash will be my next signing. I have many signings scheduled for 2017 and 2018.

Who is the one person you each want to meet in person that you haven't yet, and what would you ask them?

Nerd: Chris Pratt. “Will you make out with me?”

Turd: I honestly can't say there's anyone I absolutely want to meet specifically. I just enjoy meeting new people in general!

Matthew, in some of the pictures you have done with Shauna, you are in a submissive pose. My question is are you more dominant or submissive, or are you vanilla? Kayla any chance of you coming to New Mexico? I would love to be able to meet you!

Nerd: I don’t have any signings thataway in the next year, but I will be in Vegas with Matthew in September!

Turd: I'm naturally more of a dominant person. However, I will say that at times seeing a woman take charge or stand in a more dominant role is hot as hell.

What is the worst thing either of you have received from a fan (aside from the several propositions from hairy women that Matthew has mentioned)? What is the best thing? 

Nerd: I haven’t received anything bad haha! The best: All of the Beauty and the Beast stuff my readers send me! It makes my life!

Turd: I had done a charity auction and a man that won the auction offered to add $300 for a pair of unwashed underwear.... Yea... that happened... -_-  The best: I've on multiple occasions been messaged in regards to how I've helped someone in some way in their personal life... and some of those messages have been so deep... Absolutely amazing and humbling. 

Kayla, you said that you were scared to put this story down on paper and Matthew helped you to overcome that fear. What scared you about it? Was it reader's reactions to it or that it wouldn't be good enough, because it blew me away!

Nerd: I was scared, because my readers are used to my stories being pretty humorous and lighthearted. Especially after No Trespassing came out, which is a rom-com. Before the Lie is completely different, and even has a trigger warning. I guess my fear was that I’d already been type-casted. But Matthew’s “Fuck it. Do you, boo!” was all I needed to push publish.

When trying to be serious... who makes the other laugh first?

Nerd: Oh God, I laugh first! When we were shooting in Nashville, I told Golden it was a miracle he got any straight-faced shots from me. Matthew can flip a switch somewhere inside him like nothing!

Turd: Oddly enough I am pretty good at flipping a switch.... However, I do lose my shit out of nowhere at times haha.

What is your favourite pizza flavour? Mine is vegetarian. Other than water, is there any other drink you like? Juice, soda water, etc.

Nerd: Pepperoni and extra, extra, extra mushrooms. I hate water. I love Pepsi. But Turd forbade me to drink it. So I drink Coconut Bai and Sparkling Ice. 

Turd: Meat Lovers Pizza and I love sweat tea.

What's the most embarrassing thing that's happened to you or that you've done to someone else?

Nerd: I don’t get embarrassed very easily. Hmmmm… probably when it dawned on me that a housekeeper would end up having to clean up the mess my honey and I made in a hotel once. #oops

Turd: I was in a school with Marines in 2011. We lived in a squad bay: Open area with beds. I had been in the Navy for a couple of years, but all of the Marines were fresh out of boot camp. Any sailor or marine new to the military is naturally a bit more overboard in reactions at times. The Sgt. of the Deck downstairs told one of his young marines to run and get me. The marine ran upstairs into the shower, yelling “Sgt needs you now!” So me thinking it was an emergency grabbed a towel and ran downstairs in nothing but a towel, soaked. The Sgt asked, "What the hell, man? Why are you soaked and only in a towel?" I replied,"That PFC came in like someone had died, so hell, I didn't know what was going on." The Sgt had only needed to find out my schedule for the next day and was dying laughing.  

Do you like roller coasters?

Nerd: I’m a roller coaster junkie!

Turd: Hell yes! Merica

Best compliment you've ever received?

Nerd: Someone who reviewed Before the Lie said “KD Robichaux is a gifted painter with words. She masterfully sketches the two main characters in this book. I fell in love with both of them right away.” That pretty much made my life.
Turd: You're flag's bigger than everyone else’s. That's impressive! Referring to the 5ft by 8ft American flag I fly behind my truck Hahaha. 

What scares the absolute shit out of you?

Nerd: The ocean.

Turd: Ultimately failing at life.

Can you do the Spock, Live Long and Prosper?

Nerd: Yep!

Turd: Merica

Nerd: Dork.

Do you have a bucket list? If so, what's on it?

Nerd: Yes! I’ve pretty much done all of mine, but I still need to meet Chris Pratt!

Turd: I've been all over the world so most of mine is done. All I have left is a Home, Land, Wife, and Kids.

What is your Kryptonite?

Nerd: Nigel!

Turd: Pecan Pie

What is your favourite childhood book?

Nerd: Jumangi

Turd: Where the Red Fern Grows 

What age were you when your parents gave you 'THE TALK'?

Nerd: I never had to get the talk, because I snuck off with my mom’s Sandra Brown books haha!

Turd: Never really had the talk. I just learned as I went.

If you were to swap gender for a week, what would you get up to?

Nerd: I would masturbate. All day.
Turd: Play with my titties—assuming they're big.

Favourite position to sleep and which side of the bed?

Nerd: Left side of the bed on my stomach.

Turd: Stomach sleeper on the right side of the bed.

Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

Nerd: Only my Converse.

Turd: Only my work boots.

Nerd: Twinsies!

Current perverted obsession?

Nerd: Chris Pratt LOL

Turd: I'm just a perv in general...no actual obsessions.

Under what circumstance and without a second thought would you go outside completely naked?

Nerd: If something was about to happen to one of my kids outside, and I happened to be naked LOL

Turd: Yes, I have and I do... Hell... Golden’s shoot in Alabama in the pond. Haha

What is your least favourite thing about yourself?

Nerd: I’m 112 lbs with a double chin. Thanks, Mom.

Turd: My damn chest won't grow the way I want it to.

What colour underwear are you wearing? lol

Nerd: Black

Turd: I don't really wear any. They irritate the shit out of me.

A small child asks you where babies come from, what's your answer?

Nerd: “Ask your dad.”

Turd: “The Bump ‘n Grind,” and when they ask what that is, “You'll find out one day... but today's not the day.”
What would you say is your biggest turn-on and turn-off?

Nerd: On- Scruff against my neck. Off- Nasty teeth.

Turd: Turn on: When a woman isn't caught up on exterior features. Turn off: Nasty Teeth and Materialistic

What is the strangest thing you ever licked?

Nerd: Ummm… a penis? LOL

Turd: Well, to most, it's strange... but I mean... nowadays... who don't eat the booty like groceries?

Nerd: *chokes on spit

What is the craziest dare you have ever done?

Nerd: Naked cartwheels in my backyard.

Turd: Jump in a pond that had ice in it, butt naked.

Kiss or cuddle?

Nerd: Kiss. I’m not big on cuddling. I get hot and miserable. Don’t touch me when I’m trying to sleep haha!

Turd: Kiss... not a huge cuddler.

What is your special sexy talent?

Nerd: *giggles I can make my man’s legs shake.

Turd: I eat pie well <3 So I've been told. Lol 

Do you like the lights on or off?

Nerd: On. I didn’t get these boobs for nothing!

Turd: On :D

Do you like dirty talk?

Nerd: I like hearing it, yes. But I freeze up unless I’m writing it LOL!

Turd: Yea if she doesn't suck at it. Haha


It was love at first sight.
Not just for me, but for Corbin as well.
Our eyes locked across the room, and that was all she wrote.
But we didn’t rush things.
We wanted to do it right.
After all, we would spend the rest of our lives together.
The love of my life.
My soul mate.
He was the intense and fiercely protective soldier,
and I was his doting and faithful lover.
I found my happily ever after.
This was our story…
Before the Lie

Buy Links